Destruction; devastation or opportunity?

This morning as I stared at a painting I've been struggling with for several months I finally decided that what was required was complete destruction!  It simply was not working. To commit the act of destruction I couldn't look it in the eye so I flipped it 180 degrees and applied a random colour without thought or hesitation. The first blow struck, I felt strangely free! Another colour and another. Dots and drips and drags. The image I'd been really liking was all but gone. Checking in... mixed emotions... some mourning for what was lost; but creeping in, curiosity and a new wave of excitement. By letting go of what I was liking I was making space, creating an opportunity for something new.

That got me thinking about the many places in my life where I'm holding on to something, feeling a bit stuck, like things just aren't moving. I thought about my frustrations with work, some relationships, my spiritual practice, exercise and many other things. Why do we hold on to aspects of our lives when its clear they aren't serving us or adding anything to our lives?

Could it be fear? Fear of change, of the unknown? Or maybe it's about comfort with the familiar? Sometimes things just are as comfy as old slippers and we just cant let them go, even as they fall apart. Then there's the not wanting to wound or disappoint others... Hmmm that one 
resonates, certainly in so far as my paintings. It's always so difficult to move a painting when other people begin to like it and express strong opinions long before I feel the piece is done. Maybe it's the same in other areas of life. Well meaning comments like, "You've really got it good!" or "You have the perfect ..." can throw us into self-doubt and cause us to question our restlessness and ignore the awareness that an era has passed and something new is waiting to be welcomed in. 



What would happen if you got up close pulled some things down and rearranged others? I don't know. But what I do know is that everything becomes possible in the wake of destruction.It may look bad for a while but soon enough there is new opportunity, new growth and maybe even new wisdom.

Introducing Soul Art - Intuitive Painting Workshop

IS IT OK TO BE SEEN?

How many times and in how many ways have we been told to shrink ourselves? Many of us have been yelled at and beaten emotionally and physically into submission.


From the vantage point of a therapist I encounter people daily who have been told to be humble, modest, not think too much of themselves. What's the consequence of all this shrinking that we've been taught to do so well? So many of us have forgotten that we are meant to be lights in the world. 

We no longer laugh raucously.

 We don't dance with wild abandon.

 We paint, only within the lines.

Well I for one am working hard to remember me; the girl who loved to laugh a little too loud sometimes, the girl who danced  unselfconsciously, the girl who spoke her mind fearlessly, the girl who was a magnet for other equally joyous souls.

I know she is still in there. I see glimpses of her more and more each day. And the gift of painting has been that it has offered a way in, a way back to find what I lost when I put away childish things and became a responsible shrink-wrapped adult. 


I hope some of you will come with me. Let's tear through the wrapping and find our magnificent selves together! 

It is indeed our RIGHT to be truly seen!